Which is what I have been doing, in spades and my adventures have continued, and since I continued to supply teach, I have continued writing down those funny, touching, cute and wacky things children say.
So here are at least a year’s worth!
I had a student in Grade One read me his pattern book. “My dog can play. My dog can run. I can watch TV. I can play with my dog. I can pee in the toilet.”
“It might be weird but I like the smell of bug spray.” Riley in Kindergarten.
K -Piper confides the following to me “Cohen is a bully. I already know that.”
Grade One French Immersion: “Beaucoup de people get mixed up with mon nom”, said Abby.
“I am your guy when it comes to batteries” declared Alex, in Grade 2 FI. He had told me that my problem with the Smartboard, was my keyboard. He informed me that he had told his teacher that the day before, that the keyboard needed new batteries. It was worth a try. So I sent him off to the office to get new batteries, and sure enough, that was the problem!
The same little scamp, another day, retorts “I don't have to speak French yet. The bell didn't ring.” (He had just rolled his eyes at me when I told him he should be speaking French). Then he turns around two minutes later, speaks French, and when I give him a Bravo ticket ( gives him a chance to win a prize at the end of the week, from a draw),his response was a loud "SWEET HOME ALABAMA!"
In Grade Two, filling in temporarily for another teacher, I asked a student what she called her teacher, because some teachers use their first name. I said, "Is it Ms Ali?” “Well, yeah, that's her name!” As if to say, DUH!"
In another primary English class, where I always tell the children to call me Madame Duguay, or Madame, one pipes up, "" I can say your name, Madame Dickie!"
Mike, while reading a book aloud about where something is hiding, reads “It hides in the bathroom." Then he adds, voce sotto, and bending close to me, declares "It's pooping!"
In Grade One French Immersion, one student was being the "Mini Prof" and asking the others questions. He had drawn the name of one student who was in the washroom at the moment, which happens to be in the classroom. I was sitting between the mini prof and the bathroom, so I very loudly repeated the question to the one in the bathroom, as a kind of joke, and thinking it would be really funny if they piped up the answer. One child looked at me very serously and said, " You can't DO that!", meaning I couldn't ask them a question when they were in the bathroom. I agreed, but thought to myself, "I am the teacher: I can do anything." LOL
I was distributing $ in a Grade Five class, money that they could accumulate to buy prizes at the end of the week. I gave one student $100 and said it was given because of "gentillesse" which no one seemed to understand, so I asked the whole class, "I gave the $100 for "gentillesse" so what do you think I gave the money for? One answer? For the Book Fair?
In one Grade One FI, we were doing the Canada Food Guide, so the kids were cutting up pictures from magazines and flyers, and gluing the cut-outs under the correct food group heading, ie. Fruits and Vegetables, Dairy Products, etc. I thought they were doing really well, until little Emmett asked me so seriously, "How do you say "dog food" in French, Madame?" OMG, I had to tell him that dog food does NOT belong in any of Canada's Food Groups.
“ I don't have a sister or brother, but I have a dog brother.” said a tad wistfully by a wee one in Kindergarten.
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