HATE TO BE LATE!

Being punctual is very important to me. I have always been a punctual person. I hate to keep people waiting.   If punctuality is a virtue, I certainly make up for those who don't, in the least, give a fig about keeping other people waiting, because they are PERPETUALLY late.  I like to think that everyone's time is precious, not just my o*w*n! You are looking at a woman who keeps her car clock TEN minutes fast.

That being said, I have gotten into different predicaments because I was in S*U*C*H a hurry, to NOT be late.  One day, many years ago, I was five, YES, FIVE minutes late for a lunch date with friends.  I was so focused on my tardiness, that I backed out of a driveway too fast, and I HIT the front end of a parked car across the street.  A car, that in my HASTE, I had not even seen. How stupid can you get?

Which brings me to what transpired Monday night. It had snowed all bloody day, as the English would say.  We had a good 6-8 inches of that white s%?&!  My snow removal man hadn't come, and as I knew I was working the next day, I decided to go out around 8:00 in the evening, clean off Jiminy, and break up the huge ice chunks on my heat pump. Then Vimy and I would go for a walk, since it was a p-o-s-i-t-i-v-e-l-y balmy -10 degrees. 

Last year, I suggested and received a gift certificate for Crappy Tire, from my daughter.  Being single and owning my own home, I figured I would use that money wisely on household repairs.  Well, I splurged on a really good snow scraper, a telescopic one that swivels, and is extendable.  So, out came my DELUXE scraper, which I put to work immediately on the aforesaid tasks.

I tied Vimy up as soon as I saw neighbours coming around the corner, walking their two, mean dogs. They don't like Vimy, and he doesn't like them!  GO FIGURE! Everyone LOVES Vimy.

Well, I hadn't latched the other end of the rope properly, so when Vimy took off down the snowfilled driveway, as soon as he saw the two MEANIES, it was my TOTAL surprise to see the long rope follow him.  I had been hard at work, but I dropped everything, and stepped on the end of the rope closest to me, thereby PREVENTING Vimy from having a street brawl with the MEANIES.

At that very moment, my snow removal guy shows up. He is doing the driveway across the street, but ME, being in such a hurry, and not wanting to keep him waiting (HEAVEN FOREBID!), grabbed Vimy, leash, long cord and all, and threw him into the back seat.  Second, I quickly moved my recycling and garbage bins out of the way of the big snow blower's trajectory. Then I hopped into my car, and drove into my neighbour's driveway, while my guy blew all the snow out of mine.

WELL, in my haste, I had dropped my DELUXE snow scraper when the KERFUFFEL happened, and you can guess what happened to it?  I found bits and pieces of it all over my yard the next day.

Rather than tell myself it was my OWN fault for always being in such a hurry, I thought, "Ah, I  didn't really like that snow scraper anyway. It was too hard to manoeuver, since I am such a short ass!"