Sometimes life can really suck!

You don't have to be sick. You don't have to have lost a loved one. Life can just be totally awlful at times.  No matter what you do, you can't get anything right.  You just take a step forward, only to have to take three steps back.

Such has been my life since I have returned from my wonderful journey on The Camino.  I came back all mellowed out, at peace, calm and ready to face new adventures in my life.  At least I thought that is what they would be! However, my life seems to have spiraled out of control, and what was an adventure, has turned into a "What is going to happen next?"

I think when so many things go wrong, no matter what you do, you begin to think of yourself as a victim;  you keep waiting for the other shoe to drop.  I feel like I am constantly putting out all these BIG AND little fires around me, only to have another one spring up.

I KNOW! I KNOW! Tomorrow is another day. I am healthy.  I have a roof over my head, money in my pocket, food on the table and clothes on my back. However, that is all RELATIVE.  My reality is that despite my best, best, efforts and dogged determination, I am 61 and living with Mum.  I could be on a reality TV show named just that.

I arrived back in Canada on October 2, and by the end of the month, I was faced with: a house that still isn't sold (two years on the market), a house I couldn't buy (couldn't get insurance on it); a car that blew a gasket on me after I spent $1200 on autobody work in June, $267 worth of repairs the day before she died, and a full tank of gas put in her the day she died; and still living with my poor mother, who was only supposed to put me up temporarily. 

Thank goodness I only spent two weeks running around,  $800 for an inspector's report, and a lawyer's fee, on that potential house purchase.  Lesson learned.  Buy a house through an AGENT.  I had to be vendor and purchaser for this person selling her house on her own. What a nightmare! Not getting it was meant to be, I guess. Better $800 than $80,000.00, RIGHT?

Sitting at the top of Tetagouche Hill on a Friday at 4:00, waiting for my car to cool down (it hadn't started smoking yet!), so I could get it to the garage, from work, and listening to the inspector tell me the house had plumbing and electrical issues, little did I know my news would get worse. I paid him, the car managed to make it to the garage, where they told me that Proclivity was as good as dead.  I made it home to my mother's with her, and parked her for good.

Maman went out for her Texas Hold 'Em Night, and I had a BIG pity party. I drank a half a bottle of wine, cried until my eyes swelled shut and went to bed. I thought, "What else can possibly happen?

Well, Saturday morning, (Hallowe'en morning), when I checked my emails, I had one from a woman I had never heard of- a woman who had found my email in her husband's email contacts, and wanted to know if I knew him.  That is all I needed - an irate wife.  It wasn't my fault he told me he was divorced! What a jerk!  Whom I never met, by the way, and I told his wife that. Poor her. 

Stay tuned for the month of November. It gets better. NOT!

PS: I forgot to mention more bad timing. I had thought of sharing a cottage for the winter with another woman, so I put a deposit of $100.00 down and planned to move in on the 15th of October. Well, when this house deal looked so good, and my offer was accepted, I told the lady I wouldn't be moving in after all. Of course, I lost my deposit. More money down the drain! By then I figured it was time to look for a PERMANENT place to live, and not another stopgap measure.