Kennel Kerfuffle

Warning - Do NOT read this unless you are a dog lover!  Otherwise you will think I am a total whack job for having gone through all the trouble I did recently just to put my pooch in a good kennel, while I went on a 12 day trip outside the country.

My usual kennel man, Bob, could not take Vimy for the entire 12 days, so I scrambled to find another reputable one that could take him for the entire time.  I did find one, with one drawback. This K-9 Castle was an hour away by car.  I thought "What the heck!  I have time. I will take him up the day before my flight." I checked out the kennel beforehand, approved it, made a reservation, and foolishly thought that I was all set.

The morning I am to drive Vimy to the kennel, I call Sue to double check what exactly I need to bring for his 13 day stay. She gives me the list and reminds me that she needs proof of all his shots, especially the Lubron and some other one of which I didn't catch the name.  "Yes, yes, I have all that".  Heavens, how was I to know that NOT all kennels are the same, when it comes to which shots your pooch has to have? I assumed, and you know what "ASSUME" does.  It makes an ass of you and me. In this case, it was totally me!

I arrive with Vimy and all his paraphernalia.  Sue immediately asks for his papers.  My hands are full, Vimy is sniffing all over the place, my cell phone is pinging texts, and it is absolute bedlam in that kennel! There is a dog grooming place on one side, where three different dogs are in various stages of grooming.  They are all little yappers, wouldn't you know. I hand over Vimy's papers, which Sue peruses with a fine tooth comb, only to turn around and tell me that she doesn't see where Vimy has to the two shots she specifically mentionned by name. I tell her that he has all his shots.  I have been taking him to his regular kennel for the last eight months, and there has never been a problem with his papers.  She doesn't see what she requires, so I ask her to call my vet.  The line is busy. Meanwhile,  I am trying to call my regular kennel guy on my cell, to ask him why Vimy can go to HIS kennel, but not this one, and I am receiving and trying to answer texts. Wouldn't you know it - no cell phone reception.  Flustered, I decide to go out and check in the car, thinking maybe some of Vimy's papers have fallen out of his ziplock bag. 

I turn around and almost step on this huge BOMB that Vimy has dropped, while I have been trying to get him checked into this Hilton! He has NEVER, EVER DONE THIS.  Sue is not the least perturbed, and tells me to leave it. I can't! I am embarrassed! I run out to the car, get some empty grocery bags, and quickly scoop up most of the offending pile of poop.  I tell Sue what's in the bag, double knot it and dump it on the floor. Sue, who has finished perusing his papers,  reiterates that she definitely cannot take Vimy if I don't have proof of those two shots.  WTH? Now I am starting to get frazzled.

Sue tries the vet's line again, and thankfully, it is finally free. The vet isn't there, and the secretary advises us, as I end up talking to her, that she does not have the documentation there showing what shots Vimy has.  She tells me that my vet is in the SAME town I am in, at her main office,and we can check there. Wow, we cut a break!

I hang up, ask Sue to call the vet's main office, and decide to run out to my car to check for missing documents.  I had been on my way to do that, when I almost stepped in Vimy's bomb. In my haste, I almost run into an elderly man entering the dog kennel. A light bulb goes on in my head - "Oh no, there are still big streaks of poop on the floor, that I couldn't clean up properly with grocery bags! This man could slip and fall!"  I babble to him in English; he looks blankly at me.  I babble in French; still no real response.  Oh the hell with it!  I hold up my hand as if it were a STOP sign, run back in, pick up the bag of poop and drop it on top of the streaks. Surely, this man will NOT step on a bag in the middle of the floor.  I run back out, tell him he can go in, and search my car (to no avail) for those documents.

Back inside, it is still TOTAL bedlam. Six dogs who were outside in the yard, are now in the dog grooming area with the other three and everyone is having a great time! Vimy wants in on the fun, and has his two front legs propped up on the half door, barking and his tail wagging a mile a minute.

Sue has reached the vet's main office. She hands me the phone.  This secretary checks Vimy's file, and tells me that Vimy doesn't have those two shots. How can that be?  What am I do?  I am leaving tomorrow. I need a place for Vimy.  The secretary says "Bring him into the office right now.  Dr. T can give him what he is missing." Wow- I cut another break but by now...

I am really frazzled and wound up like a rubber ball.  I hang up, saying I will be bringing Vimy immediately.  I use Sue's phone to call my friend Jane, who lives close by. She will gladly accompany me.  Sue asks if I know where the vet's office is, and I snap "I don't know where anything is in this town!" I grab Vimy, all his paraphernalia, and out the door we go.  I pick up Jane, she directs me to the vet's and we bring in Vimy.  I have no leash, so we drag him by the collar, him squirming all the way, so we end up having to scoop him up in our arms. He weighs thirty pounds, and he is long.  Definitely NOT easy to carry.

Thankfully, my vet takes him right away, gives him his shot, and I cough up $25.  We are back in the car, when I get the bright idea to call the kennel and make sure I have the right shots now, and the right stickers.  That is what they put on your pooch's immunization card - these different coloured stickers!  Sue's assistant, who answered the phone, says "Yup, if you have the purple sticker, and he got a mouth spray, you are all set".  WHAT MOUTH SPRAY? This is the first I hear of mouth spray! Back into the vet's I run, where the secretary assures me I have the two missing stickers needed, and that he had the mouth spray one.  I ask her to please swear an affidavit to that effect, but she refuses. She says I can use her name though!

This long story ends with Vimy finally being admitted into the kennel, two hours later.  You know, it is easier to cross the border into another country, than to get your dog into this kennel!  (A good thing, I guess. Sue is only looking out for the welfare of her charges!) 

My wonderful baby bro and sis-in-law drive up and bring Vimy home, the day before my flight gets in at midnight.  How sweet to save me a two hour drive! 

However, Vimy came home minus his collar.  They can't find it anywhere at the kennel. It is even suggested that maybe Vimy was brought in without a collar. Well, he might not have had all those damn stickers on his card, but he HAD his collar, by golly! That I know. And I will swear an affidavit to that effect. 
I