IT'S THAT TIME OF YEAR AGAIN...

when the wee ones are back at school, and I am enjoying my conversations with them.  Here are a few, collected in the last few weeks.

Kindergarten/Maternelle:

J'ai un "gun" et je peux tuer un chevreuil toute seule. (Paroles d'une petite mignonne, haute comme trois pommes!)

Mon père est allergique au homard. Pas moi, mais on ne prend pas de chance! (Un petit qui a des allergies sévères aux crevettes!)


1ère année/Grade 1

Il a tiré la corde, le diable à faire!

Guess who's home? (Me- I don't know. Your Dad?)  NO... he's in JAIL and my stepfather is in the trailer.  My Dad is in jail because he set fire to his home.

I need a time-out!  Me- Why?  I was rude. (She wasn't rude; she just wanted her water bottle back, that I had her put away, because she was constantly fiddling with it.)

2ième année/Grade 2

Is my teacher on a holiday?

C'est comme ça qu'arrivaient les bébés, avant, dans le bec d'une cigogne? (Question incrédule d'une petite après une histoire que je leur avait lue.)  Moi - Non, mais c'est qu'on faisait accroire aux enfants.  La petite - PHEW!

Me - What is "green" in French?  G r e n e - replies one little redhead, rolling the r like a Scotsman. :)

Grade 3:
Madame, the door is knocking! (Sweetest little Syrian child who didn't speak English a year ago!)

Me- Why did you call him a crybaby? Rina - I was feeling a little stressed.
Me- Did you apologize to him? Rina - Well, some are saying that isn't enough. (What? What else is the poor child supposed to do?)

You must eat "vegdabells," (in her writing)

Bonne semaine à tous! Have a great week!

YOU WOULD THINK...

that a long weekend that saw me do a nine hundred kilometres road trip with my eighty three year old mother, to visit family, shop, eat turkey and bond with the grand dogs (aka fur babies) ... would have left me exhausted and wanting to stay home once I got back on Monday?

NOT a chance!  I was barely through the door, when I thought, "I need to go hiking! It's a gorgeous fall day and the foliage is spectacular. I gotta get outside!" Thank goodness my trekking buddy was ready to go on extremely short notice. So we met up fifteen minutes later,  and enjoyed an awesome ten kilometre hike along our gorgeous Nepisiguit River, with a short break for snacks and refreshments.

By the time we got back to his truck, it was dusk and a light rain had been falling for the last three kilometres.  Mind you, it was a balmy 22 degrees, so I didn't  mind in the least. We clambered into the truck, wet dogs and all, but TT stopped backing up, in order to turn off his Fitness Tracker. When he resumed, it was to find out that the back end of his truck was stuck on some big shrubbery on a sand hill, which lead down into a kind of huge sloping ditch.

He tried to get his truck out but no matter how much rubber he burned, and he BURNED a lot, that truck wouldn't budge, neither forward nor backward. Both our cell phones had less than twenty percent power, but HE had his charger in the truck, thank goodness, so he started calling for help, or using what he called his personal 911 list. Methinks he hath been in this predicament MORE than once????

TT called his son-in-law, he who bailed us out on our last canoeing adventure. No answer. SMART man. He knew better than to answer a late Thanksgiving Monday evening call, from his father-in-law. His son WAS home however,  and he answered. TT asked him to drive on the railroad track, near the iron bridge, to find us. His son's reply" NOT with my brand new truck I am NOT!"  All of which made me start giggling, as TT then explained how there was a dirt road ALONG the railway track, and that is where we were stuck.

By now it was PITCH black outside and raining steadily; our two wet dogs were jumping around in the truck and I was standing on this dirt road in the middle of no where, where I could barely see my hand in front of my face.   TT landed  himself in a bunch of wild rose bushes, stumbling around in the dark trying to find the sleeve he needed to get hauled out. He was cursing and swearing, trying to get away from the thorns. That was all I needed to send me into fits of laughter.  I couldn't stop laughing, AT ALL!

I was still chuckling when his son showed up and pulled us up out of that weird ditch, in no time at all.  The whole incident only put us back half an hour.  I was concerned that TT had maybe damaged his truck, by denting the bumper. He reassured me that he had a BRAND NEW one sitting in his second bedroom. Now there is a man who is PREPARED.  He was a Boy Scout, guaranteed!!

I was home by 8:00, none the worse for wear after a four hour adventure. All in all, a sublime ending to a sublime Thanksgiving weekend!  N'est-ce pas?

This is my FIGHT song...

...about unscrupulous contractors who low ball their estimates to get contracts, then pick and choose the more lucrative, letting the little jobs fall by the wayside.  However, not before leading you along for two months.

That is what happened to me, and I want to share, if only to help prevent this from happening to someone else.  I try to be upbeat and positive, in my posts, but sometimes you just have to VENT!
Furthermore, I hasten to add that not all contractors are unscrupulous. There are good people out there.

This summer, I needed my roof re-shingled, no and, ifs nor BUTS.  The first contractor's quote was high, I thought, but the second was 25% less. However, I was told the ventilation would have to be checked.  I thought, "Fine, let's get that done, and you can amend your quote."  That contractor cancelled two meetings, telling me he was extremely busy, so I said I could wait until September, if he could do my roof then.  I said to never mind about the ventilation. My handy Bro had checked, and he thought it was fine.  THAT was good enough for me. The contractor replied that he WOULD do my roof then, if I could wait.  I called him back in September.  He assured I was on the list and he'd be coming the next day to see me.  He called the next day, dropping the following bomb, just like this. "I am TOO busy to do your roof after all."

I was upset, but I kept my cool. I got two other quotes, both of which were in line with the first, so now I knew he had low balled his.  I was left scrambling, because I was leaving for Edmonton, and the number of warm enough days to re-shingle a roof, were getting limited.  As it was, my roof was done while I was away, but my Handy Bro and another friend kept an eye on things for me. That contractor did a wonderful job... as far as I am concerned. Plus he stands by this work, having done the roofs of several of my neighbours.

All the while, I was developing a s-l-o-w burn about all this.  I took a day to collect my thoughts. You know the  pen is MIGHTIER than the sword, right?   I didn't complain to the BBB. There is no point in my small town.  I couldn't post anything on their FB page. However, I could and did go on their Yellow Pages page.   I stated the facts, and NOTHING but the facts, ending with the line "BAD BUSINESS PRACTICES!"

MONSIEUR LE CONTRACTEUR Number 2 did NOT like that. He called me while I was in Alberta.  I refused his call. He then sent me a text asking me to take down my posting, all the while presenting ALTERNATIVE FACTS, à la Donald Trump!  What HOGWASH!!!

However, what infuriates me the MOST in this misadventure, is that IF I had had a MALE partner, I would NOT have been treated so shabbily.  That is a given!!  I am a single woman and easier to be given less consideration?

SO, I tell everyone who talks about roofs and new shingles, exactly how I was treated AND I give them the name of the decent contractor (Couture's Renovations by the way, if you live in the Chaleur area!) who, for a few dollars more, knows how to give good service, do good work and keep their word.

I might only have one match... but I can make an explosion!!!!!

MUSINGS ON MIDLIFE'S MISADVENTURES: Am I jinxed?

Am I the only one who CANNOT travel by plane, hassle free?  Or at least without major incidence? My darling daughter says I have the ABSOLUTE worst track record when it comes to flying.

In light of that comment, and my latest adventure, I decided to go back and review some of my flights over the last four years.  I certainly have had m-o-r-e than my share of hassles.

Returning from Texas last June, I missed my connection, due to sitting on the tarmac in Chicago for an hour. The plane that is, with me in it. So, I was stuck in  Montreal for seven hours.

Upon returning from Spain, I found out my connecting flight home was cancelled due to bad weather. I was stuck TWO days then.  Where? Where else?  Montreal.

Returning from Edmonton one Christmas, the plane circled an hour overhead, waiting for the ceiling to lift. If we hadn't been able to land, I would have ended up in Sept Îles for heaven's sake. I guess there wouldn't have been enough fuel to get back to Montreal. LOL

My recent return flight coming back from Edmonton, was cancelled, again due to bad weather. In September!  Not wanting to spend another 24 hours plus in MONTREAL (you guessed it!), I got myself re-booked to the nearest airport, more than a two and a half hour drive away.

I am thinking the only reason I made it home from Costa Rica in March, is because Hermanita, my little sister, was with me. As it were, we had sat an hour on the tarmac in San José, while they fixed the air conditioning. So we had less than an hour to go through customs and security, and make our connection.  It was an AMAZING RACE dash. Had I been alone, dollars to donuts, I would have gotten stuck in M-O-N-T-R-E-A-L, AGAIN!!!

I seem to have all my problems on the inbound, and NOT the outbound. I can get OUT OF DODGE, fairly well, but I have THE HARDEST time getting BACK.  Is there a message in there for me?
I know... I know! Stop trying to get home to an airport without radar. That is to say... BATHURST, NB.

IS AGE A QUESTION ... of mind over matter...?

SO if you don't MIND your age, it doesn't matter apparently?

Well, it does matter when you...

...wear your yoga pants inside out, to class. A week later, you not only put your yoga pants back on inside out, BUT you put them on BACKWARDS as well! THAT one I caught before I went out the door.  NOT the former.

...forget you have chicken roasting in the oven. The timer goes off; you intend to go check right away, but get sidetracked by work you are doing on your laptop. You don't have a strong sense of smell, so you don't actually smell the burning until you finally get to the kitchen and then the ALARM goes off in your head. The ONE in the kitchen hadn't gone off yet. Thankfully, the bottom of the roaster was well done, but the chicken was edible.  A good friend tells you she has done pretty much the same thing, so then you don't feel so stupid. You put it down to "multi-tasking."  We WOMEN do that SO well, don't we?

...follow your sister to her cottage, some 10 kilometres up the road from the meet-up point,  only to realize half way there, that the license plate of the car ahead of you looks like it is from Québec. Should be NB. You think your eyes are playing tricks, but you still keep following the car until it turns into someone's drivway in a small street, NO WHERE near the lake. OOPS!  You manage to make it to the lake by yourself, and your sister rolls in five minutes later. Why is she late? She was behind you, because she doubled back to your starting point, watching and waiting for you there.   Meanwhile, yours truly had been following another car. Duh!  Plus you have the temerity to try to tell her, AT FIRST, that she was going too FAST! How is that possible, when she was behind you????

...ask a friend someone's last name, and five minutes later, you ask them the SAME question!

 ... despite reading the recipe three times, add a half teaspoon of baking soda instead of baking powder to a small,  two serving birthday cake, and serve it to your friend Nancy, for her 61st birthday. YUCK! She was too polite to make any negative comment, but you whip up another one in no time and enjoy THAT Mud Cake Brownie, lighting up the only two birthday candles you have, showing 83 OR 38 years of age!

... NOT remembering your recent canoeing adventure where you left your keys at the WRONG place, (NOUNOUNE!) you start to walk away from your locked up car at 4:00 am in the morning at the airport, WITH your keys IN hand.  SUDDENLY a light bulb flicks on in your head AND you remember that you are SUPPOSED to lock the keys INSIDE, so that the one who calls you NOUNOUNE, can come by and pick up your car later on. DUH!!!!

CONVERSELY, it does NOT MATTER when you...

roll out of bed every morning, not too much hurts in your aging body, and you are ready and raring to face another day.

Why is it that...

ten minutes before I leave for an overnight visit to family, and I am rushing to get Vimy to the kennel, my eye glass frame BREAKS?  Just like that. Not reparable.  I never even SAT on them. Good job I had two old pair lying around the house.

the day before I leave for a ten day road trip, I blow a fuse in a daisy chain of five outlets in my living room?   It is Sunday. There is no electrician available. Baby Bro spends a good hour trying to find the source of the problem, with no luck, even with new fuses.  I gerrymander an extension from the TV/internet into an outlet in the kitchen, so that my Camino walking partner, who will be staying at my place, during a good part of my absence, can at least have WiFi AND watch TV.  I text her to watch out for the big, white ugly extension cord running through my living room.

when a friend calls you in the am, you are at ONE  bank. She calls you back in the pm, and once again you are at ANOTHER bank.  She makes a comment about my having lots of money, and I realize that while I  CERTAINLY don't, I have spent HOURS running around that day, trying to give money, and get money.  The hoops you have to jump through ... RIDICULOUS!  Est-ce que ça du bon sens?

that darn groundhog is back under my shed?  The cheeky little bugger doesn't even scurry away when I turn in the driveway!  So, back to last year's remedy... collecting you-know-what and dousing his lair.  With any luck, he will end up moving under my neighbour's garage, like he did last year. :)

You can just see his F*A*T, brown rear end poking out in the middle of the photo.

I am not called "Nounoune" for nothing!

It is a gorgeous end of summer Sunday, and TT, my trekking buddy and I, decide to go canoeing.  We drop off Jiminy Cricket just above Pabineau Falls, and drive his truck to Anaconda Mines road, to put the canoe in there.

We have a SUPERB afternoon on the river... absolutely perfect! Bald eagles soar above us, salmon jump and splash near us. We  ride small rapids and shoals, and stop for a picnic lunch on a beautiful plateau of rocks full of sparkling quartz, where I try without much success, to build an Inukshuk, while TT looks for gold. :)

We are about three quarters of the way downriver, when TT asks me where my car keys are. I KNOW as soon as the words are out of MY mouth, that they are NOT the right ones.  I left them in the truck, of course!  I only have one set, and I instinctively thought, "I can't afford to lose my keys on the river, so I will leave them in the truck."  TOTALLY forgetting, of course, that we needed MY keys to get into Jiminy and take TT back UP river to get his truck.

In MY defense, although YES, I was a total ditz, I H..A..D told TT I was leaving my keys and my cell in his truck, when we put in upriver.  Did he listen? NO! Typical male.

To his credit, and probably because he is SUCH a great canoeist and outdoors man, he just laughed, and continued to laugh all the way down to where my car was. Attempting to make amends for what was really MY blunder totally, I insisted he call now and not wait, for someone to come to our aid. His wonderful son-in-law did, and arrived at my car at the exact same time we pulled in off the river.

I must add that I was NOT the only Nounoune here.  A colleague of mine was canoeing with her husband, and friends, and there sat the two husbands, waiting for her to come back with keys.  When she got back, I smiled and said, "I am OLD, what is your excuse?"  A quizzical look and the reply "Baby Brain?", since she has two young children, made us both laugh. We hugged and agreed that we had had even MORE time outside on this glorious day, SO... forgetting our keys was NOT such a bad thing.  Wouldn't you agree?

PS:  Definition of "nounoune?" Woman who behaves stupidly!